Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Tamborine Man

Last night I had a dream, a weird dream. This in itself is a normal occurance, the weird dream that is. However, it is how it ended that made it special.

I was dreaming that Kathi and I were visiting a church. When we got their the lady who was leading worship asked us to help out. We were glad to. We were both handed tamborines since it was an all tamborine worship set (Paul?). She started out with her tamborine at her feet just tapping it lightly. Kathi and I held ours out shaking them. After a glance in our direction from the worship leader I started to tap mine in the middle. I tapped and tapped, harder and harder... then I woke up to Kathi poking me and John Mayer's "Waiting on the World to Change" on my alarm clock... boom boom-pah, boom boom-pah...

Strange how quickly an outside influence can affect your dreams.

Monday, February 26, 2007

$@%*&# Microsoft Part 2

Microsoft did a great job redeeming themselves. I was able to get some excellent tech support at no charge. Thanks Kevin & XP Guy who's name I forgot, both of you were very patient and kind. I am now up and running.

The problem was not with Money but was with my XP user profile which had been corrupted by some spyware. I now have a new user id and all seems to be good.

I give Microsoft credit. And they are forgiven.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

$@%*&# Microsoft

Dammit ALL!!!

Serious frustration has set in tonight. I am done now. Done!!!

Three times I tried to get a new file started in the free copy of Microsoft Money 2007 that we received with TaxCut. Three times. Install, try, fail, uninstall, repeat. Three times! Like a monkey with it's hand around a piece of candy in a jar. I kept at it. Failure. Utter failure.

It would tell me that I couldn't set up a new file that contained characters it didn't contain. It would tell me that I couldn't set up a new file on a disk that is write protected on a disk that isn't. It would tell me that I couldn't set up a new file on a disk that did not have enough memory. 50 G's isn't enough?!?

Okay all you Microsoft-Bill Gates-PC haters, have at it.

Friday, February 16, 2007


These were yummy. Who would have thunk it.

Monday, February 12, 2007


I need a Joseph!

Lately I have been having bizarre dreams. Not the kind of bizarre dream when you wake up you say "that was bizarre" and that is it. I am having very detailed bizarre dreams that I remember completely when I wake up. For example here is one I had last week:

Scene one: I am standing in front of the Canadian Prime Ministers residence waiting for him to appear for a speech. There are throngs of people surrounding me waiting for the same thing. I happen to be in the front row. I don't specifically see the people waiting but I know they are there. Soon the Prime Minister appears in a beige-world-leader-with-badges-pajama-type-thing that had buttons down the front and reminded me of the pajama's worn by the grandpa in the original Charlie and the Chocolate factory movie. He appears in a tall but narrow window and begins to give a speech.

Scene two: The speech is over and I find myself in a bed with four other people. The bed is outside in front of the prime ministers residence. I am on the far left side sitting up looking out over a mass of reporters that are shouting questions. Immediately on my right is Mary Lynn Rajskub who plays Chloe O'Brian on the show "24". Next to her is the Prime Minister. I don't see the two people seated to his right but I know they are there. All five of us are sitting with our backs to the headboard and our legs covered by a white bedspread. The reporters are shouting questions and we are answering them. The whole time I sat there thinking "why am I here and is this Mary Lynn Rajskub or Chloe O'Brian next to me and why the Canadian Prime Minister?" We just sat there. We didn't sleep or canoodle or anything of the sort, we just sat there as if we belonged there.

Then I woke up. I couldn't get back to sleep. I just laid there thinking about that dream and what it meant. I have no idea who the Canadian Prime Minister is or if they even have one. I am not terribly concerned about Canada and its leadership. That just added to the bizarreness of this dream. I do love Mary Lynn, that made sense. She happened to be on the tonight show a couple weeks back. Maybe that sparked her presence in my dream.

Any ideas people? Any Josephs out there willing to interpret?

PS: I now know that Canada is a constitutional monarchy that is also a parliamentary democracy and a federation led by Prime Minister Stephen Harper. So you Canadians out there don't need to comment on my lack of knowledge of your country.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Chalk Art Master

Julian Beever is the master of sidewalk chalk art. Below are some awesome photos of his work. Since it is chalk these are the only records that it ever existed once the rains hit.

Search the web for more and to see how he does it.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Clean Air Competition

So Mr. Branson is at it again. Displaying his enormous wealth with a little friendly competition.

Do you have an idea of how to extract a billion tons of carbon dioxide from the atmosphere each year?

I do. Make everyone drive this!!!

Okay, Mr. Branson, make that check out to Brian...

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Name Change Bet Results

Payton Manning is boring, Booger would have been funnier.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Pelosi One

Pelosi One article. Unbelievable. Actually, sadly, it is believable.

I say make 'em all fly coach. Dems and Reps. Get them close to us little people. The average flight of 2.5 hours will give them plenty of time to find out what the people want.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Five Second Rule

Lately my wife and I have had an issue with my daughter complaining, arguing, and talking back. These are probably typical symptoms of a nine year old but day in and day out they can get old. So Monday my wife kept a list of all the complaints and arguments that my daughter had throughout the day. When I got home I talked with my daughter about her day all the while referencing the list my wife had made. My daughter had no idea the list existed. During our conversation it was off to the side and I'd reference it with a quick glance. She must have been wondering how I knew so many specifics about her day.

During the conversation I gave my daughter a suggestion to help her reduce the amount of complaining and arguing she does. I'll call it the five second rule. I suggested that before she speaks she counts to five silently in her head. This is to give her a moment to think about what she is going to say, or to give her a moment to say it in a less whiny tone. She thought it was a good idea and immediately put it into practice.

That night when I was tucking her into bed I kissed her good night and said "I love you". Instead of the immediate return of affection she just stared at me like a deer in headlights. About five seconds later she says "I love you too daddy". I had to smile.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Body Snatchers?

Maybe she was possessed during her time in space.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Cool Bible Resource

Do you ever wish you had a different version of the Bible around so you can compare translations? With the internet you now have access to over 50 online bibles in 35 languages.

Check out www.biblegateway.com.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Why does the Geico caveman make me laugh?

I just saw the new "news interview" one.

Alive & Well

Yesterday my wife called me at work saying that my daughter (9) had a bad dream about me and wanted to talk to me about it. The phone call went like this:

B - "Hi Daddy"

Me - "Hi Sweetheart, I am sorry you had a bad dream"

B - "I dreamed that you moved to Africa"

Me - "Oh sweety, I'd never move to Africa without you"

B - "I know, but in my dream you did"

A little more father/daughter banter before my wife gets back on the phone.

Me - "She said I moved to Africa without her"

Wife - "That's all! She said you died"

Me - "Put her back on"

B - "Dad.... you were eaten by a lion"

Me - "Oh? So I moved to Africa then I was eaten by a lion?"

B - "Yes, and when I woke up my pillow was wet from crying so much"

I want to assure all of you that I am alive and well. I have no plans to travel to Africa anytime soon. However, much to the surprise of my coworkers my wife and I plan to skydive for our 15th anniversary in May! Sahweet!!! More on that later.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Just Thursday

It is an incredible day out. Really. The sun is shining, the wind blowing, and my office is a 100 degrees. I am being roasted alive. I've opened my window on the first day of February in Oregon. It's winter so I get that the heat is turned on but for crying-out-loud... 74 on the thermostat at this very moment. That and the sun beating on my open window is not helping. I don't like being hot.

One of my co-workers announced that they are not feeling well so I took a Wal-born (a cheaper Airborne). This time I did it right. You don't know what I mean by that? Then read this.


Because we are not fat enough!

Nothing like a Big Mac and fries at 3:27AM.